If my memory would allow me to rewrite the blog that I wrote in my mind last night - I would have you sitting here for quite some time. It was quite the epiphany. But, as you all know, once you write something in your mind, for some reason you can never get it out on paper the same way. At least that is how it works for me.
Suffice it to say that I have had a hard week. I guess I would even say that I am little depressed. The tears have fallen a little more this week that in the past. I’ve been thinking a lot about Olivia and Mom.
Since, I don’t feel like writing something original tonight I will share with you a poem that I found that I wrote to my mom in 2000. (on that note, I did find my book so sometime I will start another blog to use to share parts of it with you)
You took on this role when I was just one.
I can never thank you for all that you’ve done.
You took me to church where I learned of the Lord.
You bought me the things that were hard to afford.
You were always there to show your love
And prayed for me to the Lord above.
Where did time go? I grew up so fast.
I try to recall the things of the past.
When things were tough it was hard to understand.
Looking back now I see only God’s protective Hand.
It’s been just me and you for quite awhile.
We’ve taken it step by step; mile by mile.
Only now am I beginning to see
Just how faithful God is to you and me.
I’m also realizing all I’ve done wrong.
Wish now that I hadn’t taken so long.
In Rebellion and Sin, I fell deep
Now the consequences I will reap.
Yet, you are still here to show your love
And pray for me to the Lord above.
Graduation is coming - just a short time away.
Can’t wait to be home, when I can finally stay.
Not quite sure what the Lord wants me to do.
I’ll just live for Him - faithful and true.
Every day the “slate of my sin” is wiped clear
I can start over with my Savior so dear.
Thank You for loving God and being my “mother”.
I would not trade you for any other.
I love you so much - it’s time I show it more.
And want to build the friendship we should have had before.
Instead of chocolates and flowers, I give you love from the heart.
Needing to begin somewhere - there’s no better place to start.
The part of this that I need to remember most right now is:
“When things were tough it was hard to understand.
Looking back now I see only God’s protective Hand.”
My hearts prayer is that sometime in the future I will have another poem to write and I be looking back and seeing how God used this time in my life for His glory.
This is our 1st photo taken together
This was taken at the graduation mentioned in the poem.
It was from New Brunswick Bible Institute.